Save Me From the Monsters

"Can you save me from the monsters, Mommy?" my three year-old tearfully requested this evening as I tucked her in.

In my head, I was thinking, "I wish I could!" Instead, I answered her with, "There are no monsters, honey. If there were, of course I would save you from them." I proceeded to put a magic spell over her bed to protect her and keep the monsters away.

When I left her room, I thought longer about my incredible desire to protect these children from any harm and my inability to actually control much of what they will experience. I wish I could protect them from fear and frustration, debts and disappointment, loneliness and longing, sorrow and shame. I have not particularly enjoyed these feelings, and even been brought to my knees at times.

Despite what I know, they must discover the world for themselves. There will be times that I cannot be a guardian to them. Each day, I give over every fiber of my being to teach, love, guide, and provide for them. Not a moment to myself, my exhaustion capsizes any shred of desire I have to engage in my own responsibilities and interests. Although, I desperately want to give each molecule of my being to them, it is nearly impossible.

Children are an incredible reminder of how insignificant we really are, but to them...we are the world.